Maa pappu se = Aaj tum school se jaldi kaise aa gaye?

Pappu = Kyunki teacher ke sawaal ka jawaab sirf main hi de paya..

Maa = Kya sawaal tha..?

Pappu = Kal school ki ghanti jaldi kisne bajayi thi…

Bell
 
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Saas = Bhagwan ne tumhe do aankhein di hai chaawal mein se patthar saaf 
 
nahin kar sakti kya…?
 
Bahurani = Bhagwan ne aapko bhi to battis daant diye hain, do-chaar patthar
 
nahin chabaa sakti kya..?
 
Food
 
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Sunne se laachaar ek vridh shaksh ko doctor ne atyadhunik hearing aid lagaya,
 
jo kaan ke piche chhip jata tha. Kuch dino ke baad vehe vridh shaksh doctor se
 
milne pahuncha.
 
Doctor = Ab to sab saaf sunayi de raha hoga..? Parivaar to kaafi khush hoga..?
 
Vridh = Maine abhi tak parijano ko is machine ke baare mein nahin bataya hai,
 
main chupchaap unki baatein sunta hun or unki bhaawnaayen jaanne ke 
 
baad teen baar apni wasiyat badal chuka hun….
 
Old man
 
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Maa = Chalo utho, school jaao..
 
Beta = Nahin, Main school nahin jaaunga..
 
Maa = Kyun
 
Beta = Mujhse sabhi student or teacher nafrat karte hain, to main school 
 
kyun jaaun….
 
Maa = Tumhe school jana hi hoga kyunki tum 45 saal ke ho chuke ho or 
 
school ke principle ho…
 
Sleeping
 
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Ek 10 saal ka bachcha bohot dhyan se ek book pad raha tha, jiska title tha,
 
"Kids ka paalan poshan kaise kare".
 
Mother = Tum yeh book kyun pad rahe ho.
 
Bachcha = Mein ye dekhna chahta hun ke mera paalan poshan theek tarah se 
 
ho raha hai ya nahi.
 
Reading
 
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LKG class ke bachche ka paper me zero number aaya.
 
Angry Father  = What is this..?
 
Funny Kid = Papa, teacher ke pass "STAR" khatam ho gaye, to "MOON" de diya.
 
Star
 
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Neta ka beta = Papa achcha neta banne ka mantra kya hai?
 
Pitaa ne bete ko chhat par bheja or kaha = Kudo main pakad lunga..
 
Beta kuda or dhadaam se niche gira..
 
Beta = Aapne to kaha tha ki pakad loge..
 
Pitaa = Beta yehi hai raajneeti ka pehla mantra ki apne baap par bhi 
 
bharosa mat karo..
 
Jump
 
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Sonu = Maa, aaj subha jab main papa ke saath bas mein aa raha tha to 
 
unhone ek aunty ke liye mujhse apni seat chhodne ko kaha…..
 
Maa = Beta ye to achchhi baat hai, Bado ka sammaan karna chahiye….
 
Sonu = Magar maa, main to papa ki goadh mein baitha hua tha….
 
Father son
 
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Preeto = Kya tumhe santa ne ye bataya hai ki tumse shaadi karne se pehle 
 
wo mujhse shaadi karna chahta tha….
 
Jeeto = Usne kisi ka naam to nahin liya, par usne itna jaroor bataya tha 
 
ki mujhse shaadi karne se pehle wo kayi ladkiyon ko bevkoof bana chuka hain….
 
Play
 
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Santa = Kya pari aakash mein udti hai..?
 
Maa = Haan..
 
Santa = To apni kaamwali kyun nahin udti..?
 
Maa = Wo pari nahin hai…
 
Santa = Par papa to use pari kehte hain..?
 
Maa = Koi baat nahin, kal subha ud jaaegi….
 
Flying
 
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Ek kanjus aadmi apne 3 saal ke bachche ko tokri mein chhupa kar film dekhne gaya..
 
Ticket checkar = Ismein kya hai..?
 
Kanjus aadmi = Lunch hai..
 
Ticket checkar = Bach ke saahab, niche se daal gir rahi hai….
 
Baby
 
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Beta = Papa agar aapko pata chale ki main first division se pass ho gaya 
 
hun to aap kya karoge..?
 
Santa = Agar aisa hua to main khusi se paagal ho jaunga….
 
Beta = Bas isi dar ki wajah se hi to main fail ho gaya…
 
Father
 
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Pitaaji = Fail ho ya pass, tujhe motercycle lekar dunga….
 
Santa = Sach papa..
 
Pitaaji = Haan pass hua to pulsar college jaane ke liye or fail hua to 
 
rajdoot dudh bechne ke liye….
 
Riding
 
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Teacher = What is ur father name..?
 
Santa = Garmi mein I.C.S or shardi mein P.C.S….
 
Teacher = Kya matlab..?
 
Santa = Icecream saller in summer and pakoda chaat saller in winter..
 
Ice cream
 
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Santa = Papa, ye girlfriend kya hoti hai..?
 
Papa = Jab tum bade hokar achchhe ladke banoge to tumhe bhi ek milegi..
 
Santa = Agar main achchha nahin banaa to..!!??
 
Papa = To bohot milengi….
 
Couple
 
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Nurse = Mubarakh ho santa ji, aap baap ban gaye..
 
Santa = Meri patni ko mat bolna, main usey surprise dunga….
 
Baby
 
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Santa ke padosh ka ek bachcha uske ghar pahuncha. Santa badaa pareshaan 
 
ki ye phir dimaag khane aa gaya. Santa ne ussey sawaal jawaab suru kar diye..
 
Santa = Tu yahan kyun aaya hai..?
 
Bachcha = Main ghar mein akela tha..
 
Santa = Akela..! kyun..?
 
Bachcha = Aaj mere ghar mein bhai aane wala hai..
 
Santa = Wo kaise..?
 
Bachcha = Pichli baar mummy hospital mein thi to behen aayi thi,
 
is baar papa admit hain….
 
Hospital
 
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Aaye din khit-pit or jhagde ke baad santa or uski patni preeto ne socha ki unhe apni
 
shaadi ko bachane ke liye counseling ki jaroorat hai.. 
 
Isliye dono counselor ke paas pohonche..
 
Counselor ke paas pohonchte hi preeto ki bak-bak suru ho gayi. Karib aadha ghanta
 
beet gaya wo chup nahin hui, achaanak counselor ne preeto ko kiss kar liya,
 
itne mein wo saant ho gayi phir kuch nahin boli..
 
Counselor = Aapki patni ko hafte mein teen baar aise kiss ki jaroorat hai..
 
Santa = Lekin main to ise aapke paas lekar sirf Shaniwaar or Raviwaar ko 
 
hi aa sakta hun….
 
Couple
 
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Santa = Kaam wali shanti ko bulaaun..?
 
Wife = kyun..?
 
Santa = Doctor ne kaha tha ki dawaayi khane ke baad shanti ke saath so jana….
 
Medicines
 
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Husband = Ek writter ne likha tha ki, "Pati ko bhi ghar ke maamlo mein bolne ka
 
haq hona chahiye…
 
Wife = Dekho, wo bechara bhi likh hi paya, bol nahin paya….
 
Writer