Ladka(Ek sundar ladki se) = Tum mujhe achchi lagti ho..

Ladki = Meri sandal ka size dekha hai….

Ladka = Lo kar lo baat, abhi dosti suru bhi nahin hui or madam ki 

farmaayishen bhi suru ho gayi… :)

Couple

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Ek pig aur bird mein love ho gaya.

Dono ne shaadi kar li.

Dono mar gaye.

Pig bird flu se aur bird swine flu se……

Hai na….! Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani.

Pig

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Ek ladka apni girlfriend se milne gaya, kuch baat karne ke baad uski 

girlfirend chaye(tea) banane ke liye kitchen chali gayi.

Girlfriend ka mobile sofe pe dekh kar ladke ne socha ke chalo dekhte hai 

mera number isne kis naam se save kiya hai..?

Dear, Sweetu ya Jaanu.

Jab usne misscall di toh screen pe likh raha tha “Murgha No.5 Calling”.

Mobile

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Girlriend to Boyfriend = Mera laadla, mera pyara, mera chhona, mera sweet gugla,

Mujse shadi karoge? Bolo baby bolo…

Funniest Boyfriend = Tum mujhe Propose kar rahi ho ya Adopt ?

Playing with kid

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Maalkin Nokraani se = Mujhe lagta hai ki tumhare maalik office mein kisi 

or se pyaar karne lage hain..

Nokraani = Aisa na kaho maalkin..! Maalik mujhe dhoka nahin de sakte…..

Girls

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Haathi ne chinti ko propose kiya..

Chinti = Main bhi tumse pyaar karti hun….

Haathi = To phir shaadi se manaa kyun karti ho..?

Chinti = Main tumse kitni baar keh chuki hun, mere ghar mein inter cast 

shaadi ho sakti hai, lekin inter size nahin…

Playing

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Premi premika ne unchayi se aatmahatya karne ka plan banaya..

Ladka kud gaya lekin ladki nahin kudi..

Aadhe raste mein ladke ne parachute khola or chilaaya….

"Mujhe pata tha chudail tu nahin kudegi"….

Parachute

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Girlfriend = Tum mujhe diamond ki ring do, jise dekh kar main tumhe 

hamesha yaad kiya karungi…

Boyfriend = Tum mujhe ye sochkar yaad kar lena ki tumne diamond ring maangi thi

aur maine nahin di….

Ring

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Chinki = Jab bhi tum baahar jaate ho to meri photo kyun le jaate ho..

Munna bhai = Apun ko jab bhi problem hota hai, to apun teri photo dekh leta hai..

Chinki = Sach..! kya main tumhare liye itni lucky hun..?

To kya tumhari problem solve ho jaati hai..?

Munna bhai = Arey nahin re..! jab koi problem mere saamne aati hai to ye 

dekh kar dil ko manaa leta hun ki tujhse badi problem or kya ho sakti hai….

Laugh

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Patient nurse se = I love you, tumne mera dil chura liya hai..

Nurse patient se = Chal hat jhute, humne to teri kidney churayi hai..

Nurse

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Wife = You are one in thousand.

Husband = Who are the other 999?

Fight

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Mallika railway station par shooting ke liye pohonchi..

Bhikhari = Behanji 1 rupiya dedo.

Malika ne usey 1000 rs diye…

Secretary = 1000 rupay kyun diye..?

Malika = Pehli bar kisine behan kaha..!

Money

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Master To Student = A B C D Se Shuru Honay Wale Alphabets Se Sentence Banao….

Student =

A = Apni

B = Beti ka

C = Cell Number

D = Dijiye

Alphabets

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Roz college aati ho, 

Duppate se kya chuppati ho, 

Are hum mar gaye hai kya, 

Jo kitabo se dabati ho..!

Study

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MODERN GIRLS: –

1980 = Love me But dont touch me

1990 = Touch me But dont kiss me

2000 = Kiss me But or kuch mat karna

2005 = Sab kuch kar Lo par kisi ko Batana nahi

2011 = Sub kuch karo warna sub ko Bata dun gi k tum ko kuch nahi aata.

Girl on dolphins

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A man while making love to his maid, "Martha u are sweeter than my wife"..

The maid smiled and said = I know, cause the driver always tells me so….!

Rest
 
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Santa = Chuhe ko agar billi se pyaar ho jaaye, to wo kaise propose karega..?
 
Banta = Bohot aasaan hai… Chuha kahega,"Billo rani kaho to abhi jaan de dun"…..
 
Cat
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Santa = Tujhe ladki pataane ka solid idea bataun..?
 
Banta = Haan Bata..
 
Santa = Raaste se gujarti ladki ko piche se jaakar pakdo..
 
Agar ladki hans padi to samajh lo phans gayi..
 
Banta = Aur agar wo chillayi to….
 
Santa = Arey yaar phir keh dena ….. didi dar gayi…. didi dar gayi… :)
 
Catch
 
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Ek aashiq ne chaand se pucha = Ae chaand, ye bata mera mehboob kaisa hai…
 
Chaand bola = Pehli baat to ye ki main koi tere baap ka npukar to hun nahin,
 
Dusri baat ye ki itni dur se kuch dikhta nahin hai,
 
Or teesri baat ye ki ye pyaar ka bukhaar zameen tak hi rakho to achchha hai….
 
Cat couple
 
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Arz kiya hai.. 
 
Baith kar mehbooba ki zulfon ke saye mein aisa jossh aaya.
 
Wah..! Wah..!
 
Fir kya…….. Papa ne dekh liya or I. C. U mein hosh aaya.
 
Sleeping