Banta = Ye chaaku kyun ubaal rahe ho..?

Santa = Suicide karne ke liye…

Banta = To phir ubaalne ki kya zaroorat hai..?

Santa = Kahin infection na ho jaaye…..

Boil

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Santa customer care mein = Meri bheins sim khakar bhaag gayi.

Customer care executive ne cheedh kar kaha = To main kya karun..?

Santa = Bas itna bata do roming charges to nahin lag rahe na..?

Buffalo

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Santa banta se(sadly) = Kal Raat Badaa bhaari nuksaan ho gaya dost..

Banta = Wo kya bhai..?

Santa = Car par bijli gir gayi yaar..

Banta = Lekin yaar tune to car ka beema karaya tha na..?

Santa = Haan yaar karaya tha, lekin sirf ek laakh ka hi,

jabki biwi ka dus laakh ka beema hai….. 

Or ghatna ke samay wo bhi car ke paas hi khadi thi…..

Elecricity

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Santa = Agar main naariyal ke ped par chad jaaun..

To engineering college ki ladkiyan dikh jaaengi….?

Banta = Haan, phir chad kar ped chhod dena,

To phir medical college bhi dikh jaaega….

Tree

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Chhota santa = Maa kal raat ko jaadu ho gaya. Maine baathroom ka darwaja khola

Or light apne aap jal gayi…

Maa = Nalaayak tune phir fridge mein bathroom kar di hogi….

Fridge

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Santa apni girlfriend ke saath pehli date par = Ye meri pehli date hai,

agar koi galti ya kami reh jaaye, to chhota bhai samajh kar mujhe maaf kar dena…

Couple

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Santa = Yaar aaj tak mera itna apmaan kabhi nahin hua….

Meri nayi padosan ne mujhe nahaate hue dekh liya.

Banta = To ab tu kya chahta hai..?

Santa = Badlaa

Bath

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Sabziwala sabzi par paani chhidak raha tha..

Kaafi der ho gayi to santa sabziwale se bola = Agar sabzi ko hosh aa gaya ho..

To ek kilo sabzi de do….

Vegetable

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Santa petrol pump par gaya, wahan usne board par likha dekha, 

"Yahan phone par baat karna manaa hai".

Santa ne phone nikala or apne sabhi doston ko phone karke kaha: –

"Mujhe abhi phone mat karna".

Talk

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Santa = Bhabhi ka kya naam hai?

Banta = Google kour..

Santa = Google..! kamaal hai, ye kaisa naam hai?

Banta = Wo isliye kyunki ussey sawaal ek karo, par jawaab dus milte hain..

Funny

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Santa = Mujhse panga mat le, main sher ka puttar hun..

Banta = Achchha yaar, ye to bata ki sher ghar aaya tha ya aunti jungle gayi thi….

Tiger

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Santa = Apni khubsurat biwi ke saath car mein baith kar ja raha tha….

Driver ne mirror set kiya..

Santa ghusse mein bola = Meri biwi ko dekhta hai,

Chal tu piche baith car main chalaunga….

Couple Driving

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Santa ne Banta ko hindi sms bheja = Bhejne wala mahaan, padhne wala gadha.

Banta gusse me wapis sms bheja = Bhejne wala gadha, padhne wala mahaan…..

Reading

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Ek baar santa ka gadha bhaag jata hai..

Santa mandir gaya or der tak bhagwan ki murti ke aage khada ho kar prarthna ki….

Banta = Santa tum bhagwan se yehi maang rahe ho na ki tumhara gadha mil jaaye..?

Santa = Nahin yaar, main to bhagwan ko thankyou bol raha hun..

Banta = Kyun..?

Santa = Arey! bhagwan ki kirpa se jab gadha bhaga to main uspe sawaar nahin tha,

Nahin to main bhi uske saath bhaag jata…..

Donkey

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Santa = Maa main K.B.C se bol raha hun, mere pitaji ka naam kya hai..?

Maa = Sawaal kitne ka hai..?

Santa = Ek hazaar rupay ka hai…

Maa = Rehne de quit kar de, ek hazaar rupay ke liye

Ghar mein talwaarein khinch jaaengi…

Sword

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Santa ke ghar mein teen swimming pool the, do mein paani tha or ek khali..

Banta ne pucha to bola – Ek mein thanda paani garmi ke liye,

Or dusre mein garam sardiyon ke liye…

Banta = Teesra khali kyun hai..?

Santa = Kabhi kabhi nahaane ko dil nahin karta hai na, isliye…..

Bath

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Santa or Banta train ke piche bhaag rahe the..

Santa train mein chad gaya to logon ne kaha, "Weldone"..

Santa = Kya khaak weldone, jana to banta ko tha, main to usey chhodne aaya tha….

Train

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Santa doctor se = Doctor, dekhiye meri biwi ko kya ho gaya? Bina hiley duley leti hai….

Doctor = Ye to lagta hai mar gayi..

Santa ki patni achaanak uthi or boli = Lekin main to jinda hun..

Santa = Chupchaap leti reh, tu doctor se jyada jaanti hai kya..?

Doctor

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Teacher = Ek aisa waakya banao jisme urdu, hindi, punjabi

or english ke shabdon ka sahi sahi istemaal hua ho..

Santa = Ishq di gali wich no entry…

Play

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Banta = Truck ko dekhkar tum kaanmpte kyun ho..?

Santa = Ek truck driver meri biwi ko lekar bhaag gaya tha,

har baar lagta hai ki jaise mujhko waapas karne to nahin aaya hai…!!

Scare